This morning in my quiet time I read Mark 8:1-21. In this passage, Jesus feeds the four thousand with seven loaves and a few fish. As I read the familiar account, I meditated on the provision of the Lord, how He graciously gives us all we need and provides still more. After everyone had eaten their fill of the loaves and fish, seven large baskets full remained left over.
But what impacted me more than the miraculous multiplication of the loaves and fish in this passage was the question Jesus asked His disciples in their boat as they were leaving: "Do you not yet understand?"
How is it that 12 men who walked with Jesus, talked with Jesus, and were taught by the very Son of God Incarnate could remain so dull and lacking in understanding? If these men struggled and failed to understand the words of Christ, what hope is there for believers today? As I considered this problem, the answer occurred to me. Though they were exposed to the greatest Teacher the world has ever known, they could learn nothing from His words if He did not grant them the ability to understand them.
This concept has powerful implications for the theologically educated. I, among many others, am blessed to be a student at The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. God has placed me in a community of believing scholars, many of whom are at the top of their fields. He has brought me to a campus unlike any in the world, and given me an academic opportunity that few can even fathom. This is a great privilege and a great responsibility, for which I am grateful and humbled.
Yet the best educators, resources, theologians, and scholars in the world have no power to grant understanding. That ability belongs to God alone. Though we may expose ourselves to the greatest teaching, the richest and deepest theological truths, though we may immerse ourselves in every opportunity for learning and growth, we are powerless to accomplish these things apart from the grace of God in granting us understanding.
This might be a truth easily acknowledged, but as I thought about it this morning I was convinced that I don't live as though it really is true. Instead, I rely on my own powers of reasoning and intellect to learn and to grasp new truths. When that fails, I depend upon professors and theologians to help me to understand complex doctrines. I go to class expecting to learn because I am intelligent and my professors even more so.
Where is the dependence upon God in that?
The truth is, it is God who grants understanding. I learn because He opens my blind eyes, and unlocks my deaf ears to see and hear truths I could never have come to grasp on my own. While He certainly uses scholars and teachers as tools to impart understanding and insight to His children, these individuals themselves are never the source of these things. In fact, they themselves also received what knowledge they possess from God Almighty.
As I think about the implications of that even now I am humbled. He has granted me so much understanding. He opened my eyes to see my sin and understand its righteous penalty. He graced me with a knowledge of Jesus Christ and the ability to comprehend His substitutionary death on the cross for me. He gave me faith. He saved me. And ever since then He has continually taught me more and more about Himself and that salvation. All of these are things I do not deserve, and things that I could not have accomplished on my own.
Yet I am quick to turn this understanding, a gift from God, into pride, and to think that somehow it was of my doing. Oh the arrogance of my heart!
While I may go through seminary learning much from gifted professors and through the exercising of my God-given intellect, I cannot help wonder how much more might I learn if my attitude was "Lord, teach me today; open my eyes and grant me the ability to understand Your Word and the truths I will hear in class today." Let this be the attitude of my heart. Let me learn to depend upon my God in learning.Labels: Bible/theology, journal/quiet time